So What If We’re Socially Awkward?

(Originally posted in 2014)



     But what about socialization?? Ah…the overused homeschool stereotype. The socially awkward child. You know the type. Those unsocialized homeschooled kids…drooling, shoes untied, shirt buttoned wrong, fly open…yeah, those kids. What? You’ve never met a homeschooler like that? Well, neither have I.
I’ve been thinking a lot about this whole ”socially awkward” homeschoolers thing. And you know what?? Judging by what I see where we live, we are socially awkward. Thank God.
     My children and I frequently go for walks…when there’s not twelve feet of snow on the ground. (Okay…I’m exaggerating. Ten feet.;-) ) Anyway, while we’re out, we usually pass by kids walking home from the middle school by our house. What an excellent way to reinforce our homeschooling decision! I honestly can’t believe the stuff I hear these kids saying. It upsets me…what kind of guidance do these kids have? And homeschooling critics think I should send my kids to school to get socialized?? No thank you.
So, as a retort to those who like to stick to stereotypes, I’ve come up with a new definition of ”socially awkward.”

Socially awkward– (adj..) not being inclined to conform to the norms of society; i.e.:

– having respect for parents and other authority figures

– refraining from using foul and demeaning language

– (usually) enjoying the company of siblings and other family members

– refraining from talking about drug use and promiscuity as if they were suitable goals to attain

– finding value and even enjoyment in menial tasks, such as cooking, sewing, and baking

That is my definition. I’m not saying that all of the public school kids that we encounter are like this. My children do have a few friends who are genuinely great kids. Unfortunately, in our city, moral values have been steadily declining for years. And we’ve got to remember- it all starts in the home.
I once was walking home with my daughter from a doctor appointment. There was a woman walking across the street with two young girls- one about middle school age, the other a bit younger. The woman was on the phone; then she abruptly hung up. She immediately turned to the girls and started screaming at them using all sorts of profanities. By this point, we had crossed the street and were walking behind them. Her outburst lasted several minutes until we turned and went down another street. I remember my daughter looking at me, eyes as wide as saucers. She was shocked.
A few weeks later, at Walmart, another woman had a similar outburst but to an even younger boy. Is this becoming the norm?
     I don’t know about you, but I’ve never been happier to be socially awkward. And maybe I’ll start taking some of these kids under my wing and teach them how to be socially awkward, too.

What about you? Is your family socially awkward?
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Author: Shelly Sangrey

I'm Shelly, a Christ-following, homeschooling Mom of eleven children ( okay, not ALL children. My oldest is 23.) I met my husband right after graduation, and we've been together ever since. Though my life can be hectic at times... okay, ALL the time, I wouldn't change it for anything.

15 thoughts on “So What If We’re Socially Awkward?”

  1. You are sooooo right! Seriously. One thing I have noticed though, there has been a decline in the homeschool community – but it starts at home, right?

    I just had a homeschool mom tell me that her son didn’t want to play with my son, because I don’t allow them to use the computer at MY house – even on rainy days. She’s telling me what he needs in my house. She is using their relationship to get him what he wants.

    Some other homeschool kids in the neighborhood called my son fat pig and slow boy.

    It starts at home, no matter where you go to school.


    1. You’re absolutely right. I think a lot of parents are passing on what I call the “entitlement gene” to their kids- and that can happen regardless of school setting. I’m so sorry your son had to go through that.


  2. I really hate the “What about socialization?” question. Its probably the most ridiculous and makes me wonder if some realize that the first concern when I mention I homeschool is not, “What about education?” but socialization – do they believe the primary purpose of school is to socialize? And if that were the case, why WOULDN’T they think homeschooling was a better option?


  3. I know! That’s the main reason I took my kids out of school. I noticed that their personalities were changing. Unfortunately, though, now we have to deal with the stuff they’re picking up from the kids in the neighborhood. Around here, homeschooled kids are few and far between. ..Not that my kids are perfect, but there is clearly a difference in the way the school kids act around here.


  4. I’ve blogged about this as well because I keep coming across parents who insist that kids can only be socialized AT school, as if the family, neighborhood, and outside world doesn’t count. I pulled my kids out BECAUSE of the all the negative socialization at school, but I guess these parents don’t care about that!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. It boggles my mind how parents don’t think twice about sending their kids to be “socialized” with peers who have foul mouths, bad attitudes, and are promiscuous. I know that not all kids are like that, but there are certainly enough to cause concern.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Oh the stories I could share with you of our family’s personal and true experiences with the “socialization” of elementary, middle and high school. Yes there are good public schooled kids, but the bad in the system far outweighs any good for us. We saw and experienced a LOT and finally reached our breaking point.


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